An Obedient Heart

Our pastor is doing a series on the heart of Jesus.  Yesterday's sermon was on obedience.  It was very powerful.  As I sat listening to the Lord speak, He encouraged me in an area I sometimes struggle with, and that I have been praying about.  The purpose he has given me on this earth and an obedient heart as I carry out that purpose.  Not just *being* obedient, but being glad in my heart for being able to serve Him.

    The purpose that the Lord has given me is to glorify Him through being a wife and mother and teacher to my children.  So many times I feel guilty of all the things I am not, or don't do.  "I should do this or this."  The Lord patiently shows me over and over when I condemn myself that there may be a season for those things, but for now, my purpose is to glorify Him by being a wife and mother and teacher.  The next issue is doing all he called me to do with an obedient heart.  We can be obedient in actions without being joyfully obedient.  That is not what the Lord wants.  The last 2 years the homeschooling part has been a real struggle for me for 2 reasons:  I have a resistant child (to put it mildly) I am trying to teach and I have been homeschooling for 12 years and I hit selfish.  "I want".  or "I don't want".  What I know is that it is not about what *I* want or don't want.  It is about what my purpose is at this time in my life.  If I surrender my wants to the Lord, He will give me a joyful heart.  I'm getting there.  In the past several months, He has answered my prayers to want to teach my children.  Now we just have the practicalities to continue to work on.  Some of the attitude in my litttle one has improved as I have made some changes, some of my attitude toward her when she has an attitude has improved.  As I continue to yield to the Lord, I know He will be faithful to bring blessing and endurance, and that I will find joy in glorifying him in the work He has called me to. 

I love my children, and I am so thankful to be back at the place of desiring to teach them.  Now, I continue to work on wanting to teach them, even when they don't want to be taught.  I realize that I am lazy.  I want it to be easy.  I want a sweet, compliant, eager child.  I think that that is what the Lord wants, too.  He's just teaching me a whole lot along the way! 

I am leaving town today with my mom, dad, Ashley, and Daniella.  We are going to Mississippi (7 hour drive) to prepare for an estate sale we will be having this weekend at my grandmother's house.   Please pray for us today as we travel.  We will be driving through rain all day, some heavy.  As we get further south, they expect 1-2 inches of rain, some places more locally, and 15-25 mile per hour wind.  I don't expect to have computer access until next Sunday, so hopefully I can check in then. 

I hope everyone has a terrific, healthy, safe week!

Letitia