Part 2-Daniella's Adoption Story

Getting the call to go pick up your adopted child is an incredible experience.  This time, we did at least have about a week's notice.  And, you know an estimate of time about 2 weeks ahead.  Ashley and Briana went with us. 

    We drove to Atlanta (about 4 1/2 hours away) to fly out.  Our plane was very late leaving because of mechanical problems.  They had to bring in a new plane.  Otherwise, we had a great flight this time, and were only in the air for 3 1/2 hours, with no stops.  This was actually only the 2nd trip that I had ever been on a plane, so a short, easy flight was quite nice. 

    The hotel had a taxi waiting at the airport for us.  Taking a ride through the streets of Guatemala City in a taxi is a wild ride.  We stayed in La Casa Grande, which was such a neat hotel.  There is no AC, which is very hot during the day, but they do give you a fan.  The nights are pretty chilly, though.  In the center of the hotel is a pretty courtyard where the restaurant is.  Almost everyone in the small hotel has a baby or child that they are adopting, so the atmosphere is so fun. 

    We arrived at the hotel at about 9:30 that night.  The next morning we had free time to do some shopping.  That's a lot of fun, but you have to cross La Reforma Avenue, which is a 6 lane street, and no one is doing under 60.  Whoever is in front or beeps their horn the loudest wins.  It is dangerous to cross, and pedestrians have no rights of way.  We went to the "safe" shops, not the downtown market.  There's a McDonald's across the street, so that's where we grabbed lunch.  Guatemala City is basically like any other large city--traffic, high rise buildings, stores (even Chucky Cheese and Rooms to Go), but you have to throw in the occasional women in traditional dress carrying baskets on their head, or the man pulling a horse cart down this crazy road.  Once you step outside the city, though, you are transported to another time. 

    We went back to the hotel just after lunch, and waited for them to bring Daniella to us.  It was a nerve wracking wait.  I guess we felt like a nervous dad pacing while mom is in labor. They came around 1:30.  We were on the upstairs balcony waiting, and jumping at every car that pulled in.  : )   When they stepped out of the car with her, we snapped a couple of quick shots, then took off running to meet them at our room. It's a small hotel, but I did not want to miss her coming up the stairs.  I was in sandals on a marble floor, and I almost busted it trying to turn and hurry to the room.  I was shaking and in tears. 

    This was an extremely emotional experience.  This foster mom had had our little girl since she was just 3 days old, and she was now about to turn one.  The foster mother was crying before she even got to our room.  She cried so much.  She would cry, and I would cry.  It was such a mixed feeling--finally holding my little girl, but feeling like I was taking away her little girl.  In the midst of all of this emotion, you are having to have a meeting with the Guatemalan lawyer who has represented you in court, and the translator, trying to complete paperwork that has to go to the U.S. emabassy the next morning. 

Daniella with her foster mother

     Daniella was somewhat bewildered when she first came in, but she took right to us.  Never once did she cry that day.  In fact the only time she ever cried was the next day when James came in the room, and it startled her.  I had so tried to prepare us all for it to be a difficult transition for her, but it never was.  It was like she knew this is where she was meant to be.  (Many prayers had gone into this.)

    We had to be at the Embassy the next morning at 7:00.  The appointment went smoothly, and we picked up her visa and other papers that afternoon.  The rest of those 2 days were spent playing with our sweetie. 

There were so many babies in the hotel that they ran out of cribs, so the first night they pushed 2 highback wicker chairs together and put a sheet on it.  She was sandwiched between the wall and our bed.  She had been sleeping through the night, but that first  night, she woke up, crawled out of her makeshift crib over into our bed.  She crawled up on top of us and just grinned.  It was a priceless memory. 

    Daniella had a ball on the plane trip home.  There was a Guatemalan lady sitting behind me and she bounced on my legs (about killed me) half way home, playing peek-a-boo with her.   

Looking out the airplane window

The only problems we had  was after that episode where James came in and it startled her, she would not go near him.  Everytime he tried to hold her she cried.  She would only go to me or the girls.  So, that meant I got to carry her through the airports and hold her most of the plane ride.  She sat, or I should say stood on, Ashley or Briana part of the time.  Man, I was worn out by the time we got back to Atlanta, and then drove that 4 1/2 hours home.  I ended up with a severe sinus infection, and was in the bed for several days.  So, Daniella had to do some Daddy bonding time whether she wanted to or not.  By the time I was out of bed, they were best buddies. 

Daniella now at 5 years old

   So those are the highlights of our 2nd adoption experience.  It is a difficult and emotional job, much harder than my 2 pregnancies with c-sections, but it is so rewarding and worth it.  It is an amazing journey. 

  

Daniella's Adoption

Last Saturday we celebrated Daniella's fourth adoption day.  We call it Gotcha Day, but that has now become politically incorrect.  Supposedly it sounds like you went to the store and picked them up--degrading, they say.  I asked Marissa, age 8, who is also adopted, and she thought that was ridiculous.   She likes her "Gotcha Day".  So Gotcha Day it is around here.

Let me preface our story by saying that it is not typical.  Most Guatlemala adoptions take 5-7 months to complete.  Please pray that issues with the Hauge Convention do not stop Guatemalan adoptions altogether.

We began the process to adopt Daniella in July, 2000. Thinking that you will be an old pro at all the paperwork and the process because you've done it once before is only a dream.  Almost everything has to be redone.  It also took us longer because we were adding a bedroom to accomodate a new baby, and the social worker would not complete the homestudy until the bedroom was pretty much complete.  This is even though it would be our bedroom, and the girls would sleep in the old master.  (However, we LOVE our social worker, and she thinks homeschooling is great.)  I think our homestudy was complete and approved in about February of 2001. 

We got a call for a referral of a little girl the first week of May.  At that point, you race to get the foriegn dossier done as soon as you can.  You can't start on it until after the referral comes, and the process down there can't start until those last few pieces of paperwork are done.  In Guatemala, you are given the referral of a newborn, and have pictures and info for that child until the adoption is complete.  We got pictures of her when she was just a few days old. 

Lesly Cristina Gomez Alvarado

The court procedures and everything went smoothly for the first few months.  If we stayed on the tentative schedule, we would be out of PGN by mid Nov., and be able to bring her home by early or mid Dec.  When it was time to come out of PGN (which is the equal to an Attorney General's office--the final place where a lawyer for the Guat. govt has to approve you), we get the call that there is a smudge on one of the papers, so they will not accept it.  It was a very nit picky thing, especially since it was their standard form in Spanish that was still readable.  Later what we realize is that we got an attorney who does not like U.S. adoptions.  When you have one of those, you are in for it.  And we were.) 

 The form happened to be one that is difficult to get to start with.  You must have a reference from someone who will testify that you will be a good parent and can provide for the child, BUT, they can't be a friend, relative, employee, etc.  AND, they have to have a passport.  Not only that, you have to set up a predetermined time with this person and a notary that their sig. can be notarized, because before this can happen, you have to tell the adoption agency the time and date, and the whole form has to be made up in Spanish to be notarized.  Can you imagine how it feels to go up to someone, ask if they have a passport, and say, "I really don't consider you a friend, so could you please sign this statement that I'll be a good parent?  And, by the way, you have to be at the notary when I tell you to, and you'll be signing a form in a different language, so you'll just have to take my word for it what it says."  So this is the process we were going to have to go through again.  The bigger problem was that the one they threw out was a missionary who was out of the country, and we had no idea when she would be back. 

Thankfully, PGN said we could use another witness--so we had to start over that process above.  This paper then had to go to the Courthouse for a seal, Nashville for the Sec. of State's seal, and to D.C. for a seal from the Guatemala Embassy.  This could take up to 3 weeks.  So, in one day, we got the notary and the courthouse seal, then dh jumped in the car and drove to Nashville (3 hours), and they did it on the spot.  The next day, grandma came for the other kids, and he and I headed for D.C. (about 8 hours).  We went into the embassy (which was an adventure to find).  Their website said they had a one day turnaround for walk-ins and this was a Thurs.  We gave them the papers, and they said we could pick them up MONDAY.  A spontaneous gasp escaped from my mouth (we had left our kids and really couldn't afford a D.C. hotel that long).  She tells us to wait a second, and when she returned, she said we could come back tomorrow!  Friday, we picked it up, walked to the nearest FedEx drop off, and it was on it's way in 3 days instead of 3 weeks.  At least dh and I had a nice, quiet (?) couple of days to ourself.  There were very few people there the week after Thanksgiving either. 

The whole 6 week PGN process had to be started over completely instead of just picking up where we left off, so we waited and waited.  Finally about the 2nd week of Jan., we get a call.  "I'm so sorry, but now they are saying they will not accept a new witness.  It has to be the original person."  We were devastated.  Fortunately, she was back in the country, but that entire process had to be redone.  So it was back to Nashville, and back to D.C.  The whole family went this time. 

(A funny side note:  We had just been to D.C. for a family vacation in Sept. of that year before, so this was the 3rd trip dh and I had made to D.C.  in 4 1/2 months time. And, yes that was Sept 2001.  We had been in front of the Pentegon on Sept.9th!) 

Once that was done, the process went along pretty smoothly.  You wouldn't believe how ecstatic we were when we found out the paperwork had LEFT the PGN office.  Many squeals of delight.  Of course, the birthmother still had to come back and sign a final paper.  She did, but it took about 3 weeks for her to do that, and we were getting a little stressed out over that one.  This whole time, we had still not even seen a picture of our little girl since she was few days old.  Once that child is referred to you, you can't help falling in love with it, even though they warn you not to.  The stress and sadness come because in your heart, that is your child, stranded in another country, and there's nothing you can do about it. 

The call to go get her came the 2nd week of April, and she was brought to us on April 15, 2002, eight days before her first birthday. 

I know this is very long.  Thank you if you stuck with me through our story.  I will  post about our trip and pictures next time. 

Cades Cove and Other Stuff

Well, I'll start out with the other stuff.  I wanted to share a picture of the irises in my front yard. 

 I love purple irises, and we have about 36 buds.  Too bad they don't all bloom at once.  I guess it's okay, though.  This way they last a little longer. 

My yard has a lot to be desired actually.  We live on the top of a quite steep hill (ask Maria who refuses to drive up my driveway.).  If we used weed killer, it would be a mud slide.  We were finally able last year to plant a few shrubs in front of the house.  The flower garden is about the only nice place in it.  We're working on it, though.

Tomorrow is Daniella's 4th Gotcha Day.  It will be 4 years since we were finally able to hold our sweet little girl.  We had a long and agonizing wait (1 year) to be able to go to Guatemala to get her.  When they got to the hotel with her, I almost fell down on those slippery marble floors trying to get to her! 

A couple of weeks ago, we headed out to Cades Cove, which is about an hour trip from our house. 

It started out pretty overcast, but turned into a beautiful day.  We had a late picnic lunch first, then started around the loop.  The girls sat in the back of the SUV with the hatch open.  They had a blast.  They were riding backwards, so every time we'd go over a hill, we'd hear laughter, and "Weeeee." 

We stopped in one of the old cemeteries, which is the first time since Ashley and Briana were very young.  It is so fascinating and sad, too.  You see all of these tombstones of babies, some less than a day old.  And, you see where a mother had to bury baby after baby.  It gives a good opportunity to talk as you go about all of the hardships these settlers faced. 

We stopped to let them wade in the river, and it being so warm out, I forgot that it was still March and these rivers are freezing in the summertime, much less when the snow has just melted.  Most of the feet didn't stay in too long!  Daniella was the only one who could have cared less.  I had to make her get out so she wouldn't get frostbite.

Ashley and Marissa

Daniella

On the way home, we took a different route down Little River Road and stopped at The Sinks. 

Can you believe we have lived here 16 years,and my little ones have never been there, and my older girls have no memory of it?  We used to go much more when they were little, but we let busyness get in the way of going to the mountains very much.  We aim to change that. 

This is a very long post, I know.  I've got to try to get in here and post a little more often.  I hope everyone has a very blessed Easter. Briana will be singing with our choir this Sunday morning, and we are looking forward to that.

Our School Room

Gena is having a contest in which we are supposed to share our school room. 

I LOVE my school room.  We use it a lot, and it is also a good "central command center", where we keep our books and supplies.  This room used to be a porch, screened on 2 sides.  My hubby converted it into a room for us.  Briana and Ashley like to work out there because it is usually a little quieter.  Since Ashley has graduated she doesn't use it quite as much, and Marissa and I are using Ashley's desk for her math and writing work. 

This wall has bookshelves that have things for the younger girls-some of their reading books, reference type books, puzzles, craft books, rock collection, and some drawing supplies.  On top of the shelves are binoculars, a prism, nature guides, "Bob" the skeleton, "Joe" the body organ man, and a nature collection-seashells, starfish, sea urchins, butterfly, empty cocoon, etc.  Above there is a banner of the solar system that Marissa and I made and an outline map of the world.  I love this map.  You can use a sharpie and outline and fill in the names of countries, etc. as you are studying them.  The blank wall space is being saved for a time line that we hope to do.  This wall also holds a butterfly poster, GeoSafari, globe, butterfly nets, and my file cabinet.

These are the 2 desks and the bookshelves that hold reference books for the older girls and adults, a few ed. videos, and some curriculum waiting to be used. 

The last wall is WINDOWS.  We love our windows.  They look out into the woods, and we watch a huge variety of  birds and squirrels out there.  James and Marissa have just found plans for a bird feeder that they are going to build and put just outside these windows.  You can also see this room holds the tread mill (which currently has a science project sitting on it, but it does get used) and the mini tramp.  On the left is a rack holding souvenir spoons that their great grandmother collected in her travels all over the world. 

So, that's it.  This is where our book time takes place.  The rest of it happens in the yard, the kitchen, the porch swing, the couch, and lots of other places. 

As for how we school, it is very eclectic.  We do book work and lots of hands on work and "life learning". 

Briana does most of her studying on her own.  She is in her junior year, and has finished up most of her required subjects.  She also just finished a correspondance course in interior decorating.  For English right now, she is doing combination of things.  She is working on a fiction piece, reading classics, and researching and writing essays on events in history that she isn't familiar with.  Next year she will continue French, study Economics, fiction writing for fun, and finish her last credit for science.  She also hopes to continue studying interior decorating.

Marissa is a visual and hands on learner.  We use ABeka math because it has lots of colorful pictures that she likes.  Right now the math section we're on incorporates maps of some countries and their capitals, and some fact about the country.  So, along with math, we stop along the way, find the country on the globe, find it on our outline map and fill it in, and learn it's capital.  She's really enjoying that. 

For science we mostly do experiments.  Right now we are working on an Alta Vista unit study on Earth and Space.  She also has a nature journal that she records in sometimes, and we do a lot of hands-on nature study-bugs, butterflies, plants, bird watching, etc.

For history, we snuggle on the couch and read the American Adventure Series.  For language study, we are finding our groove right now.  Workbooks are out.  She hates those.  We just started a new approach where she is writing her own story.  This is big for her.  For now it is our grammar, composition, spelling, and handwriting.  We play lots of games and learn with them as much as possible.  And, of course, we study Bible and learn scripture. All of my girls love to draw and create, so we have lots of masterpieces throughout the house.  We have a small craft room adjacent to the school room filled with fabric, paper, beads, scrapbooking supplies, sewing machine, yarns, and tons of other craft materials. 

Daniella hasn't officially started school, but she has a preschool workbook that she likes to work in.  Mostly we read, play games, look at nature, and have fun. 

That's a glimpse at how we "school" around here.  There is such a variety of things we do that I would have a book to list them all.  Mostly, we love each other, try to have fun learning about God's world, and enjoy spending our days together. 

Parties and Contractors

We really had  great time at our teens and moms get-together last night.  We had Lacy and Allysa, Tracy, Sami, Coie, Ryann, and of course, my girls, Ashley, and Briana.  All teens--very sweet teens.  I love this bunch because I don't have to worry. Lots of giggles and a few loud ROFL is about all you hear out of them.  Just provide them with a lot of food and a place to talk.  They all have precious hearts , and we don't have to worry about whether their conversation is appropriate or what is going on.  It's such a shame that so many parents out there, even some homeschool ones, miss out on the opportunity to have a great time with their teens.  I love the teen years.  We moms had a pretty good time ourselves.  I had great time.  The moms here were Pat, Maria, Gena, and Jen.  Yes, we know Gena didn't have a teen girl here, but we just like her company!  Some of us used to have a group of these girls and moms that got together once a month and did something fun--game night, putt-putt, window shopping, eating out, etc.  Some of these are different girls, but I sure hope we can do this more often again. 

    I am spoiled!  My husband is a contractor.   We bought our house 16 years ago-dirt cheap.  It was a pretty good size house then, but it needed lots of help.  Most of the years we've lived here we couldn't afford to do much to it.  A few projects here and there--mostly painting, new kitchen countertops (replacing the canary yellow ones), and some other hit and miss projects like leveling out our hilly backyard and building a deck.  Once James started building, the projects around here started picking up.  First he added on a workshop next to our garage, a new front door, replacing some floors, etc.  When we started adopting our 4th child, we had to have another bedroom, so he tore the roof off the garage and added a second floor above it, which became a large master bedroom.  A screened porch became our schoolroom and a covered porch adjacent to it became our craft room last year.  This year's biggest project is a new laundry room.  For the last 16 years, guests have had to go through my tiny laundry room to get to the bathroom.  It's a pain, especially trying to hide all the unmentionables.  So, he is adding a new laundry room on the other side of the bathroom.  It will also be big enough for my freezer, extra frig, and laundry sink.  I can't wait!  Also, the spot where the washer and dryer are now will become a pantry.  I'm really excited about that since we buy a lot of bulk food, which now sits in the corner of my den. 

    The only way we are able to do these projects is because he does most of the labor himself, and sometimes what we do have to hire out we get a discount on because they are his subs. 

    The house still has a long way to go before it is close to "there", but it's tons better and more suited to our family.  I need to remember to thank him more often!  Yep.  I'm spoiled.  Sometimes it takes having other people here to remind me of that.

What a Gorgeous Day!

It was beautiful today.  I took Marissa and Daniella to the Pizza Hut field trip this morning.  That was kind of a waste as far as thinking it would be much of a field trip.  We had to be there at 10:00.  No behind the scenes look.  Basically, they took groups of 8 back and the kids dumped a container of cheese on top of an already prepared crust with tomato sauce.  And since that was all there was to it, they ate pizza at 10:30 in the morning!  It was okay for us though, because those 2 don't get a lot of interaction with other kids.  There were 4 families left hanging around talking, and the other three, who spend a lot of time together, invited us to go with them on an impromptu trip to the park.  So on top of all the other things going on this week, I decided to go.  I may regret it tomorrow when I have to drive, but I was so glad we went.  It was a gorgeous day-blue sky, perfect temperature.  The moms spread a couple of blankets out on the grass, and we ate our lunch that we stopped and got on the way to the park (because none of us wanted pizza at 10:30).  I had Nachos BellGrande.  Yum.  I don't get that too much because not everyone in my family likes Taco Bell.  We stayed at the park for 2 hours, and the kids had a blast.  I think the moms did, too.  I'm not going to know what to do if I keep getting to be so social.  Two days in a row with other homeschool moms.  I guess the neat part is that last night was about the older girls, and today was for the little ones.  

   After my short nap on the couch, Daniella and I went out on the porch swing and worked in a preschool workbook that she loves.  It was a little cool, so we covered up with a blanket, but it was still beautiful. 

   Tomorrow it's back to work, but we have some great memories from today (and something to journal about!).

Homeschool Talent Show~ A Crazy Week

  The homeschool talent show last Saturday was a lot of fun.  Maria did a great job organizing it, and I'm thankful she did this for our children.  Marissa sang "My Favorite Things".  I'm so amazed at how she gets right up there and sings in front of all those people (probably about 70 that day, and at least that many for her solo at church the week before) with no reservation.  Briana sang "Anthem" from the musical "Chess".  She was frustrated with her performance.  She was not only very nervous, but she was also still very congested from a cold she had last week.  I thought she did great once she got started.  She also played a piano/violin duet with another 16 year old homeschooler.  She was the piano part.  It was awesome!  I LOVE to hear Briana play the piano!  She has been taking lessons since she was five. 

  Marissa

Briana

Briana with Mom the "page turner".  We're

concentrating hard!

     Boy, is this going to be one crazy week!  Today I had to take Ashley for an  appointment about an hour's drive away.  Of course, after we finished we just had to go to the mall for lunch.  I got a new top from Christopher & Banks, too.  It was on sale, plus I had a $10 gift card.  Tomorrow I have a chiropractor appt, and we're having a "teen girls and their moms" party at our house tomorrow night.  Wednesday morning, I'm taking Marissa and Daniella on a field trip to Pizza Hut.  You know, that's one of those important life lesson field trips.  EVERYONE needs to know how to make a Pizza Hut pizza now don't they?  This will also call for a lesson on hydrogenated oil, saturated fat, etc!  Wed. afternoon Ashley has to go back to the same place for her 2nd of 3 appts., but her dad is taking her for me.  Thursday I have to take her back to the 3rd appt (that hour drive again).  Friday our homeschool group is having a used curriculum sale 10-2, and Briana has an eye dr. appt. at 3:00.  Saturday morning she takes the ACT, then we will leave and go straight to a birthday party.  This is all on top of the normal schedule.  Thankfully, I don't have to do the driving to piano lessons, ballet lessons, AWANA,etc.  Ashley and James do all of that while I'm cooking supper. 

    I do not like weeks like this.  Why is it that everything falls in the same week?   These 3 appts. had to be added in last minute. If I look at this schedule too much I get overwhelmed.   I am deliberately choosing not to look at the whole thing too much.  I am just asking God to give me what I need for each day. 

   On the good side, there are some fun things happening during it all.  I enjoy getting to take Marissa on some field trips, I hope to be able to sell some of these books I've got piled up, and I'm looking forward to the birthday party.  I may be comatose by the time I get there, but they can just stand me in the corner and feed me chips!  The party tomorrow night should be a hoot! 

   We have done some of these before, although there are some different girls and moms this time.  But, the moms have as much fun as the girls.  My girls always laugh and tease us saying that the girls can't even hear themselves talk over the moms laughing.  Isn't it great to have friends in the Lord that you can relax and share and laugh with?   After not having many friends around for a while, this year I am being blessed.